Introvert

I am an introvert. I am proud of being an introvert.

PS: I really need to understand much more people (than I currently have) to produce meaningful generalizations for psychological matters. You are welcome to correct me if anything below does not look right.

Introverts and Extroverts

It is usually easy to distinguish between introverts and extroverts by appearance, by looking at how willing and comfortable they are when interacting with other people. Introverts are usually labeled “quiet” and “shy”; they like to spend time alone, and tend to get exhausted from socializing.

From my very limited observation of people around me, I speculate a more fundamental definition of introverts.

Introverts are those who spend more time thinking about themselves rather than about other people.

The judge-by-appearance definition and my definition of introverts might have slight discrepancies, but I believe (for now) that they mostly refer to the same group of people.

Features of introverts

Before a certain level of intellectual maturity, introverts can be sensitive to external feedback, both positive and negative. Positive feedbacks will bring more motivation, while negative feedbacks will hurt more deeply as well.

Because of it, introverts are often put in disadvantageous positions during elementary education, at least in China. There is a rumored comtempt chain regarding Chinese teachers: university professor > high school teacher > middle school teacher > primary school teacher > kindergarten teacher. So, not every primary school teacher in China gets a PhD from prestigious universities, and things will get ugly when your teacher is pissed off. Unfortunately, introverts take more damage from it.

I am, nevertheless, not arguing that elementary education is unfair or something, because introverts do have their unique powers, for instance, the inclination to get down to thinking.

Guide to becoming friends with an introvert

Birds of a feather flock together. Generally introverts get along with each other well, because they naturally know and respect what it takes to be an introvert.

Extroverts often misunderstand introverts, and therefore I think it would be good if I summarize some common misconceptions here.

1. Introverts are NOT to be confused with people with autism. We do socialize when we want to or when we feel necessary. We can talk a whole lot.
2. But when we socialize (esp. with strangers), we drain mental power quickly. In an ice-breaking party for instance, typical extroverts cannot wait to get to know every one, while introverts will get mentally exhausted after getting in touch with a few.
3. Introverts may need to take a break from social activities once in a while, not because we are unhappy, not because we hate anyone, but because we are mentally tired and need to recover.
4. Similarly, when introverts talk little, it does not mean we do not like you. Sometimes we enjoy your presence more than words.